Voodoo Fingers of love I have to assume?
Posted 1 year ago
Now this is what I call a headline. When I read it, my mind really thinks special things about this. Interesting things. And I can guarantee I’ll bring it up in a conversation some time over Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving! As in, “What are you thankful for, Eric?” ”The end of Amish terror.”
Posted 1 year ago
Briefcase
The frequency with which people post briefcases for sale on craigslist could be improved. I bet if it were 1960 and the internet existed and there were actually people alive (like the history books say…), there would be more briefcases listed. As of now, I can only see 40 days back so who knows if my bet’s good or not? If I had to bet, I’d bet bet’s good.
Posted 1 year ago
I made this movie that I’m proud of and I want people to pay me to make them one too. Who among you can argue with that? You communists should shut up.
Posted 1 year ago
Informed-ish
I read headlines and I feel like I’ve read the news. That’s all fine and good because when people bring stuff up I can talk to them, let them know I know what the hell they’re talking about, and be genuinely interested in learning more. This process breaks down, however, when I have to read dumbass headlines like “Model Poses Naked With Snake” on ever more dumbass websites like the Huffington Post-controlled AOL.com. Ask me why I still read AOL.com and I’ll ask you why you’re such a goat face. I like the way they have stories that switch every few seconds. What of it? I don’t know about you, but when I read headlines so that I can talk to people about the ideas I get when I read 5 -10 words about a particular subject, I don’t want to have dumbass ideas about some random naked lady and a snake. That’s not a story to post on a website. That’s stupid. Nobody cares. Someone come rub my temples or whatever.
Posted 1 year ago
Scrolling to the end will not change anything…
Industrial Nyan (by DuraMac1)
Posted 1 year ago
Pep Talk
Back when I used to have imagination, I would tell stories about biting into live rats and flying around the room like a fly. Now I just play video games while I pick little nuggets of brain out through my nose. My eyes get tired by 2 pm from looking at too many things or too harsh of things when I still need my eyes for 10 more hours. And I don’t sleep or dream either.
How to jump start creativity? Write on something other than a b-log. I know. I’ll write on a basketball. That should take the pins out of my cork board.
My middle pours over my boxers like a boob in a cup. And I think you should know it.
Posted 1 year ago
10 Things to Worry About Before Going to Africa
1. Over there, soap does not makes suds.
2. Heat rash.
3. Eating berries that are actually marbles.
4. Beard trimmer runs out of batteries.
5. Coming home to a world where death and life no longer matter.
6. Coming home to a world where right is wrong and wrong is right and also someone wants to bite off your penis.
7. Contracting the Chimera virus.
8. Realizing that your actions have caused the murder of your own great grand-children.
9. Africa isn’t really there at all.
10. Death by camel.
Fun from an almost anything, always cool kind of guy.
